She Makes the Best of What's Around

Took a Big 5 Personality inventory yesterday. So apparently I am a pretty balanced person. I agree with what it assesses as my most marked personality qualities: agreeableness, stability, & intellect. I think probably I should score even slightly lower on conscientiousness, though. I really am very disorganized, but perhaps the fact that I’m not out-of-control impulsive really made the difference there. I was talking to my friend Tashina about it (oh she of the DNP in mental health) and told her I think that I am NATURALLY quite disorganized & fairly impulsive, but because of the way these inventories work, they often ask about your BEHAVIOR. I have trained myself quite rigorously to avoid the disorganized/impulsive behaviors because they make my career much more difficult, so there is a difference now between my nature & the way I actually behave.

Much fun yesterday shopping & generally being out & about! We all went out to eat at a “new burger place” that neither of my in-laws could remember the name of. They knew the general location & described it to me, so I went on Google Maps and found that it was...Shake Shack!! I was so excited. I’ve seen so many rave reviews of it online and I’d wanted to try it for a while, but of course nothing ever comes to Arkansas until it’s well & truly mainstream. It was actually very delicious; best fast casual burger I’ve ever had for sure. I did not try an eponymous shake. I did get some raspberry ginger lemonade which was A+++. Kick you RIGHT in the face lemon flavor!


On our way out, we saw a cupcake ATM! We did not get a cupcake. We did get a cookie.

After this I went shopping with my mom-in-law & got some clothes! Four new spaghetti strap camisoles & cardigans to mix & match (which have been a mainstay of my wardrobe since the early 2000s), 2 pairs of crop jeans a bit longer than capri length, and a very cool t-shirt I wish they’d had in a wider range of colors because it was SO COMFY. I went with the gray one but maybe should’ve gotten the black one too. I gave the red with cream stripes some thought, but ultimately didn’t go for it. I did notice that other than the gray t-shirt, everything I got yesterday was either red or blue! I guess I have a theme this summer.

Bryan & I went out for sushi for supper, then to LUSH, where I can spend WAY TOO MUCH MONEY. I kept it reasonable though. We got Bryan’s favorite shampoo bar (New! Is the actual name of it), Ocean Salt skin scrub, Mask of Magnaminty (my favorite mask of all time), a tea tree face treatment, and Imperialis moisturizer. I’ve also got a whole bag of Origins skin care for my birthday from my delightful in-laws. I LOOOVE skin care.

This morning Ganon & I were watching the garbage truck pick up the trash outside the house. The arm lifted up the first bin, emptied it, & put it back down. No problems. The 2nd bin, though...at the apex of the arm’s movement—fell right out of the arm into the garbage truck! Luckily it’s one of those garbage trucks that empties into a front container, then when it gets full, dumps the front container into the back container. So the worker was able to hop out & rescue the bin from the front compartment.

Much to my delight, Ganon has recently revealed he has a favorite book series! He likes the Geronimo Stilton books, which are about an anthropomorphic mouse that has grand adventures. The portion of the series that officially hooked him is the Kingdom of Fantasy books, but there are only 8 of them and he needs to branch out. I'm kicked out of the house this morning because Olga is there, so I came to the library to snag him some new books!

I got 2 from the Spacemice series and one from the Thea Stilton series.

Upon first looking inside one of the books, I was disappointed. The weird changes in font and the illustrations on every page irked the book snob in me. I watched him read a page, though, and read a few myself to examine my own responses, and I figured something out. In his case, the font changes and photos are keeping him engaged by drawing his eye to the main points of the story. For him, it increases his ability to pay attention to the book. I was sold at that point.

What really surprised me is that he KNEW the 9th book in the series was coming out soon, and he's eagerly waiting on it. This from a kid who has always ever been just "blah" about reading, and acts like we're killing him when we make him read for 30 minutes a night. He's already doing well on his Accelerated Reader goal at school, and we're well on track to meet his 22 point goal by October. I've already challenged him to beat that goal.

This is another parenting lesson for me. Kids aren't little clones of their parents; I knew that logically before he was ever born. But somehow, I keep being surprised at the ways he's different from me. The very first one was his cautious nature. I may have been that way when I was young; I don't quite remember. I know I was reserved, but I don't recall being as outright fearful and sometimes anxious as he is, and I am certainly nothing like fearful now. Years ago when I realized that, I had to adjust. I'd always thought I'd have a kid who would sail off on their own & I might sometimes have to restrain them. I never expected I'd have a kid I had to PUSH to find interests and achieve goals. Reading has been another adjustment. I read voraciously from the moment I learned how. Little Golden books turned into chapter books, which turned into Nancy Drew books, which turned into other novels. I would read anything I could get my hands on. I read so much it was constantly remarked on by my family, none of whom ever had a particularly literary bent. Again, I never expected to have a child who had to be told to read something, and then acted like it was a chore. That's a profoundly alien concept to me!

So. Another adjustment for me, and I'm thrilled that he's found something that interests him. Bryan was not much of a reader when he was young, but discovered comics in his preteen years, and his progression into an avid reader was similar to mine, only it happened a little older. Maybe Ganon will follow a pattern similar to Bryan's, and this is his start! He could not possibly have a more supportive Mama. ;)

Last night I went looking for the website of a donut joint I'd heard of down here in Dallas. Spent a while reading descriptions & looking at photos with Ganon, & now apparently nothing will do but that we get Hypnotic Donuts for breakfast. Even though they are all the way in downtown Dallas & we are in Frisco. Ganon was most intrigued by the Zooroppa, which is a glazed yeast with frosting, marshmallows, sprinkles, & frosted animal crackers. The last thing he said before he went to sleep last night was "Mmmm, I can already taste the donuts..."

Posted via m.livejournal.com.

Today has been a day of hanging out at the house, doing laundry. I work tomorrow, but then begins 2 weeks of vacation! On Wednesday, we're going to Frisco to visit the Mimi & Augie for one last time during the summer. Thus, the laundry. I have to have scrubs for tomorrow, but tomorrow evening I won't feel like doing any laundry, so I need to have all our "packing clothes" done by then, too.

It's going to be hot as hell in Texas, but that's not really different from here. In fact, it will be less humid there, so that's actually slightly better. At least my hair will be happier. Gonna have to pack lotion though. I BAKE in Texas when it's this hot.

I have decided: one of the things I will never be judgmental about is teaching kids to clean up after themselves. I will never judge a parent for just choosing to do it themselves. I'm pretty patient & persistent, and I realize the ways in which Ganon is like me means that he needs an early start on stuff like organization (because it's how he's going to compensate for his highly distractible intelligence). So I teach him, regardless of what it costs me. But MY WORD, how much more time & patience it takes to teach him how to clean things up rather than just do it myself.

Like his Mama, he has a natural affinity for lists & check boxes, so today we started that. I posted 3 check boxes on his art easel with chores beside each: clean up the toys in the living room, clear off the coffee table, & make sure the dogs were fed and watered. It kept him on task because he wanted to check off the little boxes. Just like me. So far, so good.

I'm looking forward to the drive on Wednesday. It sounds crazy, but I really like long drives. Alone, with people I really like, whatever. I am made for road tripping. I'm going to go dig through podcasts & see if there are some interesting ones for the drive. I have a bad habit of getting distracted by my iPhone while driving, & therefore picking it up to check email or Path or whatever, and that is not okay. I think stocking up on interesting podcasts might be a good solution to keep my brain engaged.

I took a bunch of pictures of Ganon at his last ball game. Wanna see? I thought you would.


Overlord at bat

( More Pictures )

*entirely in monotone, mechanical voices*
Bryan: I'M A DADDY ROBOT.
Ganon: I'M A GANON ROBOT.
Bryan: YOU ARE A CUTIE PIE.
Ganon: THAT IS RIGHT. I AM A CUTIE PIE.
Bryan: YOU ARE A SILLY ROBOT.
Ganon: NEGATIVE. YOU ARE THE SILLY ROBOT.
Me: *dies of pure, unadulterated adorable nerdity*

More than ever, this makes me want a set of "our family" stickers for my car...with aliens & robots instead of girls & boys. :D Pete could even be a little dog robot.

Highlights from my day of photography on Saturday!

( Behind the cut... )

HAHAHAHHAHAHAHA I think I'm going to laugh forever over this link from bluecanarykit: Hogwarts High.

A few days ago, I looked in the mirror on my way into the shower & realized something for the first time. I noticed it again this morning when I was changing shirts. I am changing shape.

You see, after I tossed dieting out the window I stopped paying attention to anything except the way my clothes fit, and that only to decide if I needed new clothes or anything. I didn't have any time for exercise during the nursing program. I have no idea how much I weigh.

But now, I run my legs off, push & pull patients and equipment, and hardly eat anything for 3 nights every week. I had heard Q talk about this phenomenon, but hadn't noticed it in myself until this morning. My waist is changing shape. I can't tell anything about my legs, but my waist shows a pretty dramatic change. I find it interesting, and even more: I find it interesting that I don't really have any EMOTIONAL reaction to this. At least not the one I'd have had long ago during the Weight Watchers fiasco. Once upon a time I would've been overjoyed to find that my love handles are almost entirely gone & that the post-Ganon baby pooch is shrinking significantly. Now I just find it curious. Also I find myself wondering if my clothes are gonna hang right, or if I'm going to have to do more shopping. -_- I think it'll be okay, since it's just the waistline & most of my clothes are tight around the baby-pooch anyway.

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This morning I am home with Ganon. Carla, the delightful lady with whom he stays during days, lives in a rural area much like ours, with one big exception. Carla's house and Kim's house (my cousin, at who's house Carla often keeps the kids, since 2 of them belong to Kim) on the west side of town, close to the Cache River. The flooding from last week has already gone down here on the farm, but out there, the water is still rising as the runoff heads through them toward the river. Only large trucks could get through yesterday and the water was still rising according to Carla. Yikes! So I had to figure out alternate plans for Ganon. Instead of staying awake all night like I usually do, I just went to bed late, then got up with Bryan this morning. Momma's got an appointment at 9, so she's going to do that, come back & get Ganon, and I'll go to bed then. Hopefully it'll be enough to get me through tonight; I think it will.

Oh, the fun things you have to do for childcare.

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Speaking of Ganon, he's been hilarious lately. He's much more verbal, at least when he's around people he knows. He's like his Daddy; he clams straight up if you're a "stranger", but if he knows you well, he'll say anything to make you laugh. My current favorite thing is when you say "I love you" he goes "You DO?!" as though he's overjoyed, and then when you say "Yes!" he goes "I loveshoo TOO!" like it's such a huge coincidence that he just discovered.

He also does that most time-honored of geek traditions: memorizing scenes from his favorite shows and quoting them back. Most of the time he does this in the context of acting out the scenes with his toys. He still likes Thomas but he's currently way into Bob the Builder. Bryan & I have deemed Bob an acceptable substitute, if not completely worthy. We liked Thomas better because it was narrated by a single person & didn't have voice acting. If something has voice acting there's always that one character with a horrid voice that you want to murder. For me, that one is Scrambler on Bob the Builder. I swear if I hear that stupid 4-wheeler yell "SCRAM TO THE VALLEY! SCRAM TO THE VALLEY!" one more time I'm going to set it on fire.

Now that he's been going to child care of sorts, he's better with other kids. Carla keeps kids for 3 other moms, 2 of whom are also nurses. It's 5 kids at the most; 3 of them are school-age, so it's just Ganon & Addison during the day. After school, though, he plays and plays with the other kids until Bryan comes & gets him, usually about 5. Since then, Ganon has been a lot more outgoing at the mall playground. He basically chooses a kid & goes to play with them. I've been monitoring who he plays with, and sometimes I'll redirect him to someone more appropriate (if he's latched onto a kid who's hitting or pretending wrestling moves, that's RIGHT out), but I don't usually have to intervene. He still shows a huge introverted streak, though. Sometimes we go by the playground and he peeks in. If he's in a certain mood and there are kids shrieking & running everywhere & it's crowded, he looks at me and says "I want trains first" and we go to the bookstore, instead. My mom would force the issue with us; if we were feeling introverted she felt she should work against that for some reason. I don't. If he's feeling introverted I'm not going to throw him into a playground packed with screaming kids. That's kind of torture.

He's learning manners. He says "please" & "thank you" most of the time without being prompted, and since he's developed a cough these days I am teaching him to cover his mouth. Now when he coughs he looks at me with his hand over his mouth like "Am I doing it right?" and of course I gush over how big a boy he is. :)

Of course as he gets older I'm going to lay off these particular details because hey--when he's in junior high he's not gonna want me to talk about his underpants. But for right now: did you know they make boxer briefs in 4T? HOW FREAKING CUTE IS THAT?

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Sometimes if it wasn't for my awesome coworkers, I'd be trolling for a position in the ER by now. -_- This week, I'm scheduled Monday, Thursday & Friday nights. What the mess kind of schedule is that? You'd think that since you're dealing with night-shifters you'd try to schedule them 3 shifts in a row, or at least you'd try for only 1 day gaps. But this is ridiculous. -_-

I'm still at a loss as to which I like better. If I work 3 shifts in a row, it gets it out of the way & I'm good for the rest of the week. Gives me all of my break days together. The major drawback HERE is that the 3rd shift? Holy crap. That is one killer night. Like the end of a long race, where you only keep running because you forgot how to do anything else. When it's broken up with one off-night in the middle, it's irritating because I have to keep that night schedule, but at least it's a break.

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With that, I'm off to see what I can accomplish while I'm awake. I think I want to vacuum.

PUBLIC SERVICE ANNOUNCEMENT!

I don't want to look like a know-it-all, but I'm noticing a widespread misunderstanding about surgical masks. This isn't general knowledge outside of the medical industry (and there are even some inside who misunderstand), and in a situation like this year's H1N1 flu, the misunderstanding can be dangerous.

Surgical masks DO NOT protect you from breathing in organisms. Surgical masks are meant to keep the surgeon or surgical assistant's germs away from the surgery being performed. It protects OTHERS. The mask that protects the wearer is called an N95, and if you have not been fitted for the proper size, it won't work for you either. In fact, some people with certain facial features (think wide, square jaws or prominent cheekbones) cannot be fitted for an N95 mask at all. Neither quiara or I could be fitted, and we're required to wear a respirator in any airborne precaution rooms.

When I explained my idea for this post to Bryan, he thought perhaps I should just let people do whatever makes them feel better. Then I thought "What if someone visits a friend with H1N1, thinking they're safe because of the mask?" That won't do, because likely you'd end up with it anyway. It's not a bad flu, as flu goes, but it isn't exactly fun, either. Courtney, my sister, had it at the end of July; her fever spiked to nearly 105º and she felt like crap, but she didn't get the pneumonia complications. Some people are much more prone to those complications.

Surgical masks are appropriate, however, if you have symptoms and you MUST go out. It's really better to stay in where you won't be exposing the general public, but if you're getting out to go to the doctor and get yourself some chicken soup, orange juice, & Tamiflu, by all means wear a surgical mask. Don't breathe on the rest of us!

This has been an announcement from your friendly Livejournal nurse.

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At least, I hope I'm still a nurse. I took the NCLEX-RN yesterday at a Pearson Testing Center in Little Rock. I talked Bryan into taking Friday off, and so Thursday night we put Ganon in the car and drove first to Newport where Bryan wrote the day's schoolwork on his whiteboard & organized it for the substitute teacher, and then to Little Rock. We stayed at the Hampton Inn Little Rock West, which was no more than 4 minutes from the testing site, and has a Krispy Kreme in front of it. I don't like Krispy Kremes even now, it seems. I tried one.

Anyway, I don't know what to tell you about the test experience. I was fingerprinted on the way into and out of the testing area. I had my photo taken before I went in, and had to confirm it was me on the way out. I had to empty my pockets, show them there were no inner pockets to my cardigan, turn my iPhone off, remove my earrings, and then put all these things into a locker. I was allowed the clothes on my back, my locker key, and my ID. That was it. As for the exam itself, I don't know what to say about that, either. I was absolutely certain of maybe 4 or 5 questions, out of the 120-something I was given (the test can range from 75-256 questions, depending on how many are needed to ascertain you will pass). For the rest of them, I used critical thinking prioritized by 3 cardinal rules of nursing: 1) Protect the ABCs (airway, breathing, & circulation), 2) Protect patient safety (consider fall risks, etc), and 3) Consider transmission of infections. I can't tell you what the questions were like or what they contained, because you sign something saying they can sue your buns off for cheating if you do that. I'm not allowed to divulge any of the content. THEY WILL SEND NINJAS AFTER ME. I'M SURE.

After the exam, we ate lunch at the River Market, where I ate the best hot dog I have ever tasted from a guy with a real-honest-to-God-New-York-City-hot-dog-cart. He had developed a very fiery mustard that day, & when I loved it he decided to name it Hillary Sauce! (I wonder if he was telling the truth? He seemed like a flatterer, but I have decided to believe him.) Also we had cupcakes from Brown Sugar baking company. A very large number of semi-uniformed high school students came in then, and we asked where they were from. Turns out it's a new charter school in downtown Little Rock. I accidentally left my purse in the building, and only realized it when we got to the car. I ran like a madwoman back into the Market & found our table, where I found my purse sitting happily & untouched...at a table full of high school students. They'd been wondering when someone might come back for it. The cash in the purse was still there, sitting right on top. Granted, it was just a $5, but still! I picked up the purse & looked at the students. "You know, if I'd left this purse at a table with my husband's students, I might never have seen it again." They grinned at me. I liked the look of those students--all of them. They all looked...I don't know. Aware. Observant. Bryan said they lacked the "brutish" or "simple" quality many of his own students can sometimes show. If Ganon grew up & went to a school like that, I'd be ecstatic. Bryan said that if he could teach at one of those schools, he'd stay in education for sure.

Then we decided to continue the adventure & drive to Memphis. We went to the Apple store & bought Snow Leopard, and we're not impressed with their new way of doing things. There's no cash register, no place to just walk up & buy something. A concierge helps you with your decisions & then rings up your purchase as well. It's pretty awesome if you're going to buy a computer or make another major purchase. The problem with that is, when you're me & Bryan & you just want to buy a copy of Snow Leopard, you're left wandering around & looking for someone to help you. I saw at least 3 other people in the same predicament as me. We just wanted to buy the OS, but everyone was busy helping people to buy computers or iPhones or iPods.

Supper at Whole Foods Market, of course. We've been out of peanut butter for a few days, and with Ganon's peanut butter & jelly phase in full swing, that wouldn't do. Ganon must have heavy wheat bread (we use double fiber wheat by Nature Valley), Smucker's strawberry jam, and Whole Foods honey roasted PB. So we got some, and Bryan & I had awesome pizza for supper. Ganon was very silly, talking to everyone and refusing to eat...and then he ate ALL the bananas on the way home. *headdesk* Oh my boy. He did turn down a cookie & ask for a banana, so that made me happy.

Came home, and at that point the Tired caught up with me. I had worked a 12-hour shift, driven 2 hours, gotten to sleep a little past midnight and not slept well at all. Then I got up at 6, got ready & took an emotionally exhausting exam and had the above adventure. By the time I got home I was shattered. I collapsed in bed and slept HARD until this morning. In fact, I've had a 2 hour nap already today and I'm STILL exhausted. I feel like I'm never going to be rested again.

I cannot know my exam results until Monday at the earliest. Searching a name on the state registry requires a subscription ($10 a month for unlimited searches) or a one-time name search payment of $5.50. In either case, exam results are not available until at least 72 hours after the exam time, according to the site. Rather than paying $5.50 I will just have them look it up at the hospital, and then I'll know. I want to say I HAD to pass; there's no way I couldn't pass. I'm good at this. I'm new and I can only carry 3 patients (4 if they're very uncomplicated) at once, but they get good care from me. They feel like I'm paying attention to them, that I'll listen to them, and I have good basic nursing judgement about their needs. I love nursing. It's hard, it runs me ragged and leaves me worn out & used up at the end of the day, but I could not stop doing this job, pursuing this career, if you paid me to. I am a nurse at the bottom of my soul, where everything else is stripped away. I can't have failed that test.