hillarygayle | Entries tagged with work

Worked all last weekend. You wouldn't believe how many hand lacerations I've repaired. I'm going to need to ask everyone in my geographical area to please step away from the heavy & sharp objects. I've had 3 crush injuries and at least 6 lacerations in the last 4 shifts I worked. The most impressive damage was someone who accidentally put their arm through a glass & metal door. Y'all, don't expect a door will hold your weight!

I've also had 2-3 admissions, which is unusual for the area of emergency in which I work. They try to send the lower acuity folks over to the Annex (where I work) because there are fewer infrastructure type resources (heart monitors, vital sign machines, only a Omnicell & supply Pyxis), so most of what I see are simple laceration repairs, twisted ankles, sore throats, chronic low back pain that magically became an emergency at 6pm on a random Tuesday, krunny noses, & the occasional N/V/D (nausea, vomiting, diarrhea). Every so often, a VERY high acuity patient sneaks in because they simply don't look bad to the naked eye--it takes some digging to find the real problem. In the last year I've admitted a major heart attack who came in because of a cold, a hip fracture (bad enough to need next-morning surgery) that walked in, a pneumonia patient who had no fever, no cough, and just a little shortness of breath, and a back pain that turned out to be a ruptured kidney! My admissions this week were along those lines: walk in looking not bad at all--run a white blood cell count or get an x-ray or two and OH hey, why don't you come in & stay for a night?

Of course it hasn't helped that I was sick this week. Bryan went to a teacher training last week in the exotic far away lands of Arkadelphia and he brought home this upper respiratory virus which he then thoughtfully gave to me. Booooo. I was okay on Tuesday, sick on Wednesday, and then yesterday was REALLY bad. Fortunately I didn't have anyone who checked in with cold symptoms, because I probably would've stomped on their foot. When you're rocking pseudoephedrine, prednisone, acetaminophen/ibuprofen combo, and oxymetazoline nasal spray just to function enough to come to work, and someone comes in with a runny nose wanting a work excuse? Breeds just a touch of resentment.

I do believe things are about to change a bit though. We recently hired several more nurse practitioners. It's enough that M, the physician owner of the staffing agency for whom I work, has decided to start staffing the Main ER with 4 NPs per day: 2 from 09:00-17:00, and 2 from 17:00-03:00. This is in addition to the Annex, staffed by 1 NP from 09:00-21:00 and one from 11:00-23:00 (usually me). As the 2nd most senior employee, I get to state a preference for more shifts in Main or Annex, and I'm going to go for Main for sure. Not only am I specifically trained for that, I'm almost a year into my practice. I'm comfortable with my work flow and my processes, and once that happens it's only a matter of time until boredom strikes. UNLESS I'm learning new things, that is--which is what happens over in the Main ER with the very ill patients who come in. Lots more experiences interpreting labs, which is something I'd like to get better at.

My RV really wants to go somewhere! Ganon's birthday is Monday, and between that & my work schedule, there's no time for us to take the RV anywhere before school starts back. I'm going to plan us a trip to northwest Arkansas anyway, though. That can be done in just a couple of days. We can stay at an RV park over in Bentonville or Bella Vista and see the Crystal Bridges Museum of American Art and the Amazeum. A trip like that might even be MORE fun on a random weekend during the fall, when the heat is less unbearable. Even later in the fall would give us the gorgeous foliage of the Ozarks.

We're going to our first Dragon*Con over Labor Day weekend! I'm so excited! My mom is working on a costume for Ganon to dress as Link from BotW. I can't wait for...

Ganon: I'm Ganon.
Fan: Don't you mean Link?
Ganon: No, I'm cosplaying as Link. My NAME is Ganon. :D

I'm taking one cosplay outfit: my Pokémon professor costume from last Halloween. It's incredibly easy. It's just one of my old lab coats to which I sewed a Pokéball patch on the front. Put that on over one of my cute dresses, and *poof*! Pokémon professor! I already have a bit of an animated look, with my colorful hair and my professor-type glasses and my stand out makeup. When I wore it last Halloween, people knew instantly--even the parents at houses we went trick or treating at. Other than that, I think I'm going to stick with my geeky shirts & skirts from Her Universe & Tee Fury.

Right now, however--I am craving pizza with mushrooms, and I just found that Lost Pizza now supports online ordering. It's go time!

Current Mood: calm

Boy did I have one of those days on Sunday! We saw a zillion people (I saw 24 people during my 12 hour shift) and they were either there for some complete garbage, non-emergent complaints or they were there for things that made my hair stand on end. No middle ground! It left me feeling incredibly introverted yesterday. The way I put it to Bryan was "If the entire world got mad and said it was no longer speaking to me, I'd probably say 'You promise?'" I wanted to hide under a blanket but I did the next best thing & went & got a massage instead. I felt somewhat better, but on the way home traffic turned into Mad Max Fury Road so I got a little crabby again.

I will say this, though: best way to become my favorite patient? I was in a room with a very nice lady I'd just diagnosed with a very annoying injury. She told the friend with her "Doesn't she look like someone?" Indicating me. "Not someone in particular, I don't think. I think she just looks like a 1940s movie star. She just has that kind of face." Oh yeah. INSTANT favorite patient. I was also told on Sunday that I looked like Adele (I've gotten that once before), Penelope Garcia from Criminal Minds (I've gotten that one A LOT and I've still never watched the show), and told that I was "kinda woke for a white lady" and "See, she's real. I told you she was cool." So it's not like it was all bad.

This morning there's no milk in the house, and while I can forego the sweetener in my coffee, I've got to have milk or cream. I really should start keeping a stash of those little shelf-stable creamers for just such occasions.

Tomorrow is going to be a hard day, I fear. As many of you know, we have 3 dogs: Pete, Sam, & Harry. Sam & Pete are quite old for rat terriers; they're 15 years old this year. Last year, a tumor began to show up in Sam's groin area. It didn't seem to bother him; it wasn't painful or bleeding, but recently it's gotten much, much larger. At this point it appears to cause him difficulty in movement, and while he doesn't help or cry, he doesn't move much and I think the sheer weight of it is causing him back pain. Bryan & I have long since come to terms with the mortality of our dogs; we've been feeling like they were living on borrowed time almost for the last 4-5 years. Ganon, though, bless him. Ganon is almost 11, and he has never lost anything that he's loved. This will be very much a first for him. He cries when we talk about it. Last night I asked if he wanted to go with us & said we were thinking of this afternoon, but he requested one more day. I imagine Sam will probably be fed bacon & be very petted & made over tonight. Hospice patient doggie & all that. :( In honor of Sam, have a pic of my doggos:

Current Music: Bryan playing Terraria

I must highly recommend the chocolate chip pancakes at Eggcellent Cafe. Even if I could only finish about a third of the stack!

My chocolate chip pancakes from yesterday. They were so good, but WOW that's a lot of pancake.

The board at work today. 😆 Thanks to Dr. Lane.

Normally they don't write the name of the advanced practice provider (the collective name for NPs/PAs) who's working the main ER up on the board, but Dr. Lane couldn't handle that mine wasn't up there, so this happened. LOL! Unsurprisingly perhaps, incidences of getting called "Creecher" peak around Halloween.

Working on some ARNA educational content this morning. I need more coffee. And maybe a mint Oreo.

Current Mood: awake
Current Music: Aziza Dance ++ Aziza (feat. Dave Holland, Chris Potter, Lionel Loueke, Eric Holland)

I think I've figured out the balance between the two different emergency room settings, and because of that, I am happy that I get to work in both at different times.

Express Care is where triage levels 3 & lower go. These are people who need simple sutures, who have nausea, vomiting & abdominal pain but no vital sign changes, migraines, and other such stuff. People who come in complaining they've had leg pain since 1999. Seriously that happened to me. Main ER is obviously where all the more serious stuff goes. It's the thing you think of when you think of emergency.

I've decided the trade off is this: in the main ER, there's excitement and new things and adrenaline, but there's also uncertainty and self-doubt. I'm a "newbie" over there, and I ask a ton of questions. I'm learning all the things I realize my program didn't really prepare us for--mainly, the intial stabilization of a critically ill patient (we got much more experience managing critical patients when they were already inpatient and relatively stable). In EC, there's tedium and sometimes eye-rolling, but there's also comfort in the relative certainty that I know what I'm doing over there. I am far more confident in my diagnoses and ask fewer questions regarding workup and treatment.

So. Having sorted that out in my head, I'm quite happy that I get to work both places. There are major benefits to both.

Friday Five from a couple of weeks ago!

1. Have you ever done something awful to your hair? What happened?
Not particularly, but do you remember when that layered bob was in style? Everyone called it the "Rachel" because Jennifer Aniston on Friends made it popular. I had something approaching that cut, though I styled it a bit differently. It looked okay on me, because I have a nice face shape for it, but looking back, meh. It just wasn't outstanding.

2. Conversely, at what time in your life have you looked your best?
I don't have a good answer to this question, because for the last 12 or so years, I've been super intentional about my appearance. Everything I wear, all my makeup, my hair--all of it is very intentional and I've considered exactly what it will express to most people. Because of that, whatever image I have now is exactly what I want to look like, and that's been true for the last 12 years.

3. Do you have a favorite article of clothing? Tell us what and why.
Oh, I do, I do. It's more like several articles, though, because it's all my custom-made eShakti stuff! I have 2 dresses and 3 or 4 skirts that are entirely bespoke: I took my measurements, chose my dress, and requested any alterations I wanted (like skirt length; I love 50s silhouette skirts just below the knee). What arrived in each case is a garment that is literally tailored to fit me. The dress I wore for the party after graduation is one of those dresses. There is nothing like putting something on and having it fit perfectly in every possible way.

4. Confess the worst fashion trend you ever succumbed to.
Hmm. I grew up in the 80s (born in 1979) so I lived through a lot of seriously questionable fashion decisions. I can't say I "succumbed" to those, though, because I didn't have a lot of say in what I wore before my teenage years! I went in for grunge in the late 90s, which coincided with my late teens, but I don't hate what I was wearing when I look back at that time. I mean, oversized flannel shirts and jeans are comfy and the right plaid can be adorable. I think I'm going to go with the huge fluffy bangs and spiral perm I had right when I was about 11 or 12. Think Reba McEntire in the 80s and early 90s. In fact, my hair looked exactly like hers, and I got told that a lot. It was in style then, but looking back now it's like ooooooo. Yikes. Also, my first pair of glasses was a huge, round-lensed affair with thick, clear, acrylic frames. Like, you've seen Barb on Stranger Things? I had those glasses. If I had been older during the 80s, I would've BEEN Barb.

5. Are there any clothing / fashion trends today that you simply don't understand?
I'm not so much the fashion police. For the most part, I'm perfectly content to wear what I want, and let others do the same as well. A lot of people get super judgmental about leggings worn as pants, but usually I'm just kinda "whatever" about it. EXCEPT when the leggings in question are the same color as the skin of the person wearing them! THEN it looks, from a distance, like the person is not wearing any pants. Do I think they shouldn't wear that? Nah, that's up to them. But the 8 year old in me is still gonna giggle at the idea of apparently pants-free people in public.

So I've been saying for a while I wanted a silicone wedding band I could wear at work. Obviously I do a lot with my hands, so it's better for me to avoid a metal wedding ring at work. Also there's the alcohol hand foam, which isn't great for metal and appears to react with it to tear my skin up under my ring. I'd wanted to see if a silicone band did that, and of course there's always the danger I could catch my ring on a bed or other piece of hospital equipment in a rush situation like a code.

So I got this one!

My silicone ring came in today! I chose @saferingz because I wanted more gender neutral options (unlike the brands that carry mainly pink & turquoise for women and black & camo for men). This is antique metal finish. It's so comfortable I've forgotten several times I was even wearing it!

It's from SafeRingz. I chose them because they had mostly gender-neutral options, and I didn't like the fact that Qalo & Enzo had basically turquoise and pink and peach for women vs. camo and brown and black for men. SafeRings has actual metallic finishes!

Here's a video of the ring in all its squishable glory:

I wore it all day yesterday and forgot I even had it on! Can't wait to see how it works at work...in part because that means I'll be WORKING, and I'm still going stir crazy waiting on my privileges!

Current Mood: bored
Current Music: "Reflection" ++ Jeff Coffin ++ Sometimes Springtime

It's the Friday Five, on a Saturday! Get yours here:

thefridayfive.

1. What’s your favorite way to stay cool in late summer?
Air conditioning! I live in the southern US (Arkansas, specifically), and it's both hot and humid here. There's really no way to defeat both of those things together without A/C, and the vast majority of homes built here have central A/C. Leaving that aside, I also drink my coffee iced in the summer, and I really love swimming and water parks! This summer I've been obsessed with iced green tea lattes from Starbucks.

2. Are you ready for autumn yet?
Autumn is my favorite season and I am SO VERY READY for it! I'm always ready for both autumn and spring. Extremes in temperature are not my thing, especially when they go on for very long. I'm always ready for it to warm up in March and to cool off in September (although it really doesn't cool off dramatically here until October). I like pumpkin, cinnamon, nutmeg, and the smell of smoke. I like jeans and skirts with cardigan sets and jackets. I like ruby red, topaz yellow, and all the bold, dark, saturdated jewel tones that come into style during fall.

3. What do you have left to do before summer ends?
Working on getting all the physician signatures for my collaborative practice agreement to work in the emergency department. I'm hoping to have it done by the end of August so I can start working in September.

4. Has it been a good summer for you?
You know, it really has. At the beginning, I graduated with my doctorate in nursing. Then I went to Chicago for the first time and took a review course for boards. Had a couple of trips here and there and everywhere, and took a 3 week exercise course at the local university as a volunteer for training personal trainer students. Went to interview with the emergency room and was hired after the world's shortest interview. Studied like a madwoman throughout, and then finally passed my nurse practitioner boards on August 2...only to find out immediately that my dad-in-law needed heart surgery. That went well, though he's currently dealing with some gall bladder issues now. It's been much too busy for my taste, but most everything that happened this summer has worked out in my favor, so I'm very satisfied. I worked hard, and it's paid off. Now, to start work so I can actually get PAID! :)

5. Have you started Christmas shopping yet?
LOL THAT'S CUTE!

...

No.

Current Mood: productive

Again, stealing a "fill in the blanks" from

thejessone because I love them. They're fun & they make my brain wake up.

A

- Available: Nope. Married for 14 years to the love of my life.

- Age: 35, I think. I can't keep up.

- Annoyance: Not being able to get hold of ANY OFFICE at my school on the first phone call. You ALWAYS have to leave a message & someone calls you back.

- Animal: Elephant

B

- Beer: Cider. Preferably Woodchuck.

- Birthday: Marsh 12

- Best Friend(s):

thejessone,

asqmh, & Bryan

- Body Part on attractive person: Smile. Has to be bright, open & engaged.

- Best feeling in the world: Figuring out a perfect solution to a sticky problem

- Blind or Deaf: Blind

- Best weather: Partly cloudy with a high of 72 and a slight breeze from the south

- Been in Love: Very definitely

- Been on stage?: Yes.

- Believe in Magic: No, but don't I wish!

- Believe in Santa: Heh. I don't think I ever did!

C

- Candy: Snickers Dark, Milky Way Midnight, Reese's Dark, Dark Kit Kat. If they would ONLY make a dark chocolate Twix I'd be set.

- Color: Purple, red, & green

- Chocolate/Vanilla: Chocolate, specifically dark

- Chinese/Mexican: Mexican

- Cake or pie: PIE!

- Continent to visit: Australia & Asia. They're so close I can just hit them both at once, right?

- Cheese: ALL OF IT. Huntsman is my all-time favorite, however.

D

- Day or Night: Night

- Dance in the rain: With my BFFs!

E

- Eyes: Gray

- Everyone's got: Something to teach others

- Ever failed a class?: No, although I did drop a geology class once at Harding because it was taking up too much effort for a general education class, & I felt like it was detracting from other classes.

F

- First thoughts waking up: COFFEE.

- Food: Definitely. All of it. Except curry.

G

- Greatest Fear: Not being able to help

- Goals: Doctorate in Nursing Practice. C'mon, May 2016!

- Gum: is gross.

- Get along with your parents?: I do indeed.

- Good luck charm: Makeup, maybe? When my makeup looks super awesome, I feel more confident & I do better. I don't go into an exam without killer makeup, especially perfect eyeliner & lipstick.

H

- Hair Color: Copper red

- Height: 5'5"

- Happy: Pretty darn happy!

- Holiday: This one is hard! I really love all holidays! I'll say for major holiday: the Thanksgiving-Christmas season and for minor: St. Patrick's Day because I got married on it.

- How do you want to die: At the ripe old age of 92 I will lay my Harley-Davidson motorcycle down in a successful last-ditch effort not to hit a little girl walking a puppy across the street. It will be instant.

I

- Ice Cream: Buttermilk vanilla from Loblolly Creamery in Little Rock, AR

- Instrument: I am capable of playing the flute, the piano & singing. I don't do so much of the instruments anymore.

J

- Jewelry: Wedding ring, earrings. If the earrings are dangly, no necklace, but if they're studs, I usually wear a necklace as well.

- Job: Graduate student technically, but I am an RN training to be an acute care nurse practitioner with a doctorate in nursing practice.

K

- Kids: Ganon, the coolest 7 year old I've ever met

- Kickboxing or karate: Kickboxing! I should take it up.

- Keep a journal?: I'm getting back into this one!

L

- Love: the whole world! Boom de yada!

- Letter: H

- Laughed so hard you cried: The last time I played Cards Against Humanity with the Borg, Bryan,

stripedsocks &

moogintroll.

M

- Milk flavor: Milk.

- Movies: Lord of the Rings trilogy, Matrix trilogy, the current Marvel universe movies

- Motion sickness?: No, unless I'm wearing an Oculus Rift. In that case, DEBILITATING motion sickness.

- McD’s or BK: Taco Bell! But if I gotta choose between those two, I'd say Burger King.

N

- Number: 4

O

- One wish: That someday I get to have an RV.

P

- Perfect Pizza: Greek pizza without chicken from Upper Crust in Jonesboro, AR. The Lucky 7 from Mazzio's comes a close 2nd.

- Pepsi/Coke: Dr. Pepper!

Q

- Quail: Are delicious & they lay teeny tiny eggs

R

- Reason to cry: Frustration

- Reality T.V.: No way

- Radio: iTunes radio or Pandora

- Roll your tongue in a circle? Yes

- Ring size: Size 9 on my left ring finger. Right hand fingers much bigger due to skin grafting & scar tissue.

S

- Song: Of the moment: "Do My Thing" by Estelle, featuring Janelle Monae.

- Shoe size: 9

- Salad Dressing: Peppercorn

- Sushi: Salmon, tuna, avocado, & the spiciest sauce you got back there.

- Slept outside: UGH camping freaking sucks. But yes I have, because I don't consider a tent to be "inside".

- Smoked?: Yes...but not cigarettes. Gross.

- Skinny dipped?: No way.

- Shower daily?: Yes, but I don't wash my hair daily. Hair gets washed every 2-3 days.

- Sing well?: This is my "open secret" talent. I probably could've been a professional, but I never had the ambition for it.

- In the shower?: LUSH goodies!

- Strawberries/Blueberries: Both together with whipped cream.

T

- Tattoos?: The "coffee rings" design from Dave Matthews Band "Before These Crowded Streets" on my left wrist.

- Time for bed: Old Navy tank top, Bath & Body Works bedtime aromatherapy scents (honey/chamomile or lavender), melatonin if I really can't get to sleep, Benadryl as a last resort & only if I do not have someplace to be the next day!

- Thunderstorms: Love them if they don't have a lot of wind, but if they have high winds they scare me to death

U

- Unpredictable: Not once you know me. I imagine I might look a bit unpredictable to outsiders, but Bryan & the Borg can guess right 95% of the time.

V

- Vacation spot: The Ozarks.

W

- Weakness: People having hard times.

- Which one of your friends acts the most like you: None of my friends really act like any of the others. We like it that way.

- Which on of your friends makes you laugh the most: Bryan.

- Worst feeling: Feeling stupid, failing at something even though I REALLY tried.

- Wanted to be a model: Never did, but if someone will give me Igigi or eShakti dresses in payment, SURE, I'll be your plus-size model!

- Where do we go when we die?: I don't think anyone REALLY knows.

- Worst Weather?: Searingly hot & suffocatingly humid.

X

- X-Rays: A couple. C-spine in winter 2009 because a patient tried to wrestle me. Both hands & both knees re: pain.

Y

-Year it is now: 2014
-Yellow: Flower in my hair

Z

- Zoo animal: Elephants

LAST PERSON WHO…

1. Slept in a bed beside you? Bryan
2. You went to the mall with? Bryan & Ganon
3. You went to dinner with? Bryan & Ganon
4. You talked to on the phone?

girlwithoutfear (Facetime last night so she could tell me a CRAZY hospital story)
5. Made you laugh? Bryan
6. Hugged you? Bryan
7. Said they loved you? Ganon
8. Held your hand? Ganon
9. Spoke with?

asqmh
10. You cried over? Everyone & everything at my old work situation

Sheryl Sandberg & Unpaid Internships. I really dislike the entire concept of unpaid internships. I actually always have, but this articulates it better than most: it's the privilege. I felt this very keenly during my own unpaid internship (I was in a media-type profession, then). During the summer between our junior & senior year at Harding, Bryan & I were expected to perform internships. Both were unpaid, and we had different experiences: mine worked the devil out of me, receiving a great deal of work (some of which went into their own internal publications & external advertising) for free, and Bryan's was worthless. He did no work & got exactly zero out of it. We were married & this was summer. We got no financial aid for this because we weren't even enrolled part-time; it was a single "class". We were expected to somehow have a place to live & food to eat, but without being paid. Our families were a huge help, and thanks to a friend of my family we had a free house to live in for those 3 months. We made it through--comfortably, in fact. Didn't have much money for luxuries, but we got by without starving. Most people can't do that, and that makes the entire practice unfair. It's the wealthy helping their own. It frustrates me no end, and it's a terrible way for someone to do businesses if she claims to be a feminist, and wants to help other women achieve what she has.

In the story of someone who actually IS leaning in: Worked the last couple of days, and I don't have to go back until next Thursday. September officially starts my "weekends", and that'll be fun. I'm actually looking forward to it, and so are the other weekend ladies. I talked to Lulu & Brenda yesterday, and we agree that weekends will be getting a ton of "bravos", and that it's just so sad that all the weekday folks will be deprived of my chocolate chip cookies. ;)

Finished financial aid online counseling today, so soon my federal loans will hit my UTHSC account & I can stop worrying about that $7k debt I suddenly have hanging out there. At least until I graduate, when hopefully that won't seem like such a massive, insurmountable thing.

Bryan went back to school on Monday and today he's getting his room together for open house tonight. We will go see his room & meet Ganon's new teacher, etc. Ganon starts school on Monday. I'm happy about it, but I miss him when he isn't at home. I'm worried about how I'll do with weekends, but I WILL see them every day after school. Bryan's considering a class they've offered him at the community college again, and the idea makes me all frowny, because it means more time away from him.

Not gonna think about that today though. I've finished the reading for biostats & now I'm going to go take a look at the quiz. It's a gorgeous day, so I'm feeling like maybe me & Ganon ought to get out of the house. They say to keep up with your favorite hobby during grad school, so I'm feeling like I should take some photos.

Out back again, in my "office". :)

I slept in until 11am! I knew I was tired, but I didn't know I was THAT tired! I woke up, built my back porch office, and graded a few formal concept maps for my clinical class. I instructed the last 2 clinical days on Friday & then on Tuesday, for students who had missed a clinical & needed to make that day up.

I bought a bunch of shade perennials from a local nursery, & now I have to decide where I want them. I keep thinking I should do the front yard to make the house look prettier, but on the other hand I want to put them back here so I can see them more often. I just spend more time in the back yard.

I was free float charge for the last 2 days at work. That's good news. The bad news: it was a BEAST OF A JOB those 2 shifts. Seriously; we had 2 days there that if we had not had a free float charge, I don't know what we would have done AT ALL. :( I started IVs, dropped Dobhoff tubes, did medication passes, answered call lights, gave PRN pain medication, did discharges and admissions, and helped the PCTs change beds & give baths.

Amusing: one of my dogs insists on using the dog door. Even if the back door is partially open, Pete will step through the actual dog door to get back into the house.

I am looking at the Sephora website at all the AMAZING Urban Decay eyeliner pencils, but I'm avoiding buying them. The Sephora in our JC Penney is going to open in June, & I'm doing my best to hold off buying anything until then!

I am having...not quite a recurring dream. Let's say I'm having a series of dreams with the exact same theme. In them, we're living in a house. It might be this house, might be a different building, but in the dream I know it's our house. In these dreams, every time, I find an extra room or maybe an entire extra wing that we didn't know about, even though we've been living in the house for a while. I might find them behind a hidden door, or behind a wall when I discover some sort of chip in the paint. A few times I've found them behind something we were using for storage, and in one we were USING an extra room for storage because the doorway was filled up with shelving, and I decided to tear down the shelving & use the entire room, at which point I found 3 more rooms behind it. In the very first one I can remember, Bryan wasn't excited about it at all, but in all the subsequent dreams we've started talking excitedly about what we were going to do with the extra space. In last night's particularly meta episode, I dreamed I was talking to Bryan about these dreams, and THEN found an extra room in the house when I scraped at a hole in the paneling!

I am not much on the idea that dreams mean something, but I do know that we believe scientifically that dreams are probably our brains processing something. The fact that I'm having a continuing series of dreams with the same theme...does that mean I'm continually processing the same thing? That there's something my brain is trying to wrap itself around, or something I'm cooking up & I'm not even aware of it? It's happening often enough & going on for long enough that I'm starting to really wonder.

I'm taking Sam to the vet today. I'm the nurse, but I have no feel for doggie body language, & Bryan does. Sam does yelp sometimes when you bump into him, and he tenses up when you go to touch him. I can't find anything obviously wrong on examination, but I don't know the first 2 things about dog anatomy & physiology, so off we go to Dr. Doyle.

Our weather has turned to fall for the moment! When I woke this morning to see Bryan & Ganon off to school, it was 57 degrees. :) I had my oatmeal & coffee out on the back porch like a little old lady & I was over the moon about it! I love my porch so much, and having an iPad makes it even better.

Work is okay these days. Except for a major snafu in staffing/scheduling about a week ago, things have gone relatively smoothly. I'm feeling very confident & happy in my skill level & the trust people have in me. Two of the physicians I respect most have shown a great deal of trust in me recently, and that was a major boost. I've gotten comments recently about how long I must have been a nurse, and when I ask for guesses, my patients have guessed anywhere from 8-15 years (though at the age of 33, I think 15 years is a bit far out). When I tell them it's been 3 years since I passed boards, they usually go on to tell me I was born for this profession. I feel like that's true, actually.

Now. On to a doctorate. One of the APNs at work pointed out that I could work in a capacity as a DNP that hadn't occurred to me: DNPs are certified to perform certain procedures. I could work in an ER or interventional radiology if I wanted to. I still think I like the idea of a hospitalist program, though.

I am in the middle of an poop schedule though. 2 shifts on, 1 day off, 2 shifts on, 1 day off, 2 shifts on. I am on that 2nd day off right now, and I am headache-y and tired. Only 2 more. I can do this. I swear, centralized staffing might be my least favorite thing that's happened since I started work at my hospital.

Current Mood: content
Current Location: Home
Current Music: "Red Step" ++ Bassnectar & Jantsen ++ Divergent Spectrum

Work is rough these days. Usually our census is pretty low during the summer. In fact, any time I think of when I got low census (when we're called off because we have too many nurses scheduled for the number of patients we have), it was always around a major winter holiday (Thanksgiving or Christmas) or during high summer. This summer is much different: it's so blasted hot. A lot of frequent flyers are in because they overheated.

That strikes me with a thought: I don't think I've ever defined "frequent flyer" here.

For an ER nurse, a frequent flier is someone who shows up at the ER a lot, & it's often used as a derisive term for someone who is seeking pain medication. I work on the floor where the ER sends those who come in truly sick in unstable ways, though, so you're not going to find otherwise physically healthy folks looking for a high. Don't get me wrong; some might like a high. :) They're just also legitimately sick.

For us, a "frequent flyer" is a person who has a chronic disease or condition that occasionally requires acute management. So, a type 1 diabetic who gets an unrelated illness might need an insulin drip to manage their glucose during that illness. Someone with COPD might get pneumonia & need a BiPAP to help them breathe off enough carbon dioxide. Someone with a heart condition might go into acute renal failure if they get too hot. These are our frequently flyers. In addition to being very legitimately sick, we get a little attached to them. In some cases, a LOT attached to them. While the ER definition of frequent flyer is the one most often used in pop culture, to a stepdown/PCU nurse it's often a term of endearment.

I have taken care of a couple of our frequent flyers this week; ones who would not normally be in during the high summer. It makes me sad. They certainly don't need more crap than they already deal with.
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Work really interferes with my ability to do the July photo assignments. I missed the 7th & 8th; I think I'll make them up today. Photo assignments relax me, & I think part of my problem on work days is that I feel I can't relax, or possibly shouldn't. Time is at a premium during my workday, & I feel like I can't spare the seconds to think about a photo when I'm trying to think about saving lives & improving customer service scores (& I have to think about that because part of the clinical care coordinator job is to think about it).

On my days off, though, I think about photography a lot. I'm really in the mood for it today.

Jeff coffin has evidently discovered he has a twitter account & has decided to use his iPhone accordingly. He tweeted a photo of a Dave Matthews Band concert...from the stage. :) I sorta love that. I wish he'd join instagram.
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So on Wednesday, I'm scheduled to rack up a few letters! I take the PCCN-A exam! When I pass that, I will officially be considered an expert in my field of nursing. I'll be qualified to instruct continuing education, I'll qualify automatically for coordinator/manager positions at other places than just my current hospital, & in general be considered excellent in my field. I'm sorta stoked about this. I love the idea of having acknowledgement that yes, I do love progressive care & that I can be considered advanced in that field. I don't get a raise or anything, but there's something about the prestige of new letters. Plus they get to go on my name badge. From a possibly jaded point of view...I can use the PCCN on my badge to increase customer service. If you think you're being cared for by a specialist, you're more likely to view your care as better.

So tomorrow we are going to Little Rock to the museum & all that, then we'll spend the night in a hotel & go someplace for breakfast & all that. Then at 13:30, I sit for the PCCN & we see how it goes from there! Eeeeee!

Right now it means I'm going to go check out the PCCN review modules & mainline information about renal failure physiology (I'm great at the nursing care part but I'm rusty in the physiological processes) & endocrine syndromes (thyroid storm, etc). Probably ought to bone up on SIRS & resolving sepsis while I'm at it.

Posted via LiveJournal app for iPad.

Current Mood: excited
Current Music: "Busted Stuff" ++ Dave Matthews Band

When you are in the hospital as a patient's loved one: avoid coming in, guns a-blazing, announcing how you went to nursing school/medical school/are a CNA. Claiming any sort of medical expertise in order to impress or intimidate us is doomed to spectacular failure in one of two ways.

If you did NOT attend medical school, go to nursing school, whatever--we're going to know that VERY QUICKLY. It's gonna take us approximately 30 seconds to figure that out; less if your nurse is, unbeknownst to you, capable of reading body language professionally & saw "lie" written all over you to begin with. Even if your nurse was oblivious, the first time you don't understand the function of s VERY common medicine? Yeah. Please note: the level of education you claim is directly proportionate to the size of moron we will assume you to be when we catch on. Ergo, if you pretend to be a CNA and then do not know that a 230/122 is a very high blood pressure, we may give you the benefit of the doubt & assume you could've just been a very bad CNA. If you claim you went to medical school & then do not know what arterial blood gases are & why we take them, we will assume you to be a tremendous tool.

If you DID attend medical or nursing school, bravo! You're one of us! Use that to your advantage & let us find out in a low key, organic way. When you ask about starting the beta blocker or the ace inhibitor, we'll grok that something is up, & we'll ask what you do for a living. Sheepishly admit you're a doctor/nurse but you didn't want to make a fuss, & we'll usually love you. Question everyone's most minute action, & note each time "I'M A DOCTOR!" or "I'VE BEEN AN RN FOR 25 years!!!" and you will find you suddenly get not a single scrap of info you didn't specifically ask for. Quite frankly, its a hospital. You couldn't spit in any direction without hitting someone who is a MEDICAL DOCTOR!!!1! or HAS BEEN AN RN FOR XX YEARS!!!1!! It does not make you a unique & beautiful snowflake. From another angle, the odds are good that you're not a specialist in the area that your family member is admitted for, & then you look stupid for questioning those of us who DO specialize in them. If you're a labor & delivery nurse, your critical care stepdown nurse might actually know more about post-heart surgery care than you do (heaven knows I'm not about to tell an L&D how to do her job!). If you're a family practice doc, the cardiologist probably knows quite a bit more than you do about electrophysiology. There's no shame in letting a specialist be a specialist & do their job. When you flaunt your expertise to fight us every step of the way, it just makes you look like an immense douche.

Posted via LiveJournal app for iPad.

Current Location: US, Arkansas, Jonesboro, Craighead, Turtle Creek Rd, 2915

Notable moments on Saturday:

☀

thejessone got me a birthday basket of win! It had a Hard Candy blue eyeshadow duo (which I'll be wearing tonight, I think), some dark chocolate Reese's cups, dark chocolate raspberry Ghirardelli squares (SO YUM *flails*), some yarn, a vanilla scented candle (of which Ganon approves; he loves vanilla scents, just like his Daddy), and LOLLIPOPS. They were ADORABLE, shaped like slices of fruit. You can see the orange one in the pictures I posted of Ganon (of course he asked for the orange one right away).

☀ I got to take all kinds of pictures & mess with different lighting (breezeway with glass walls, outside, outside in shade, inside the Market).

☀ I turned Jess on to Mo's Dark Bacon Bar. I insisted she try it, and of course she looked at me like most people do when I'm offering them chocolate that contains bacon. She's a fellow adventurer, though, so she tried it...and when we went to Whole Foods later, she got her own. :D

☀ I got to eat at Rumba for the first time since the Flecktones concert. I found myself wishing DESPERATELY the Flecktones (or hey, the Mu'tet) were playing that night. Would've made a pretty epic evening. Rumba alone was awesome, though. That is some DARN good food; next time I think I'm going to try the steak skewers that Jess got. They smelled delectable. Also: I had a Latin Kiss (rum with peach schnapps, cranberry & pineapple juices). Highly recommend!

☀ Also at Rumba, they seated us right next to the outdoor patio, with the doors flung open and rain pouring down. I LOVED it. We had this amazing slight breeze with the smell of the rain & the river. I could've just laid down & slept on that booth bench.

☀ Zak & Ganon were both wearing Converse, so I got a picture of Big Converse & Little Converse. I love Big/Little pictures so much.

☀ As Jess & I were buying beads from Beads by Becky in the Market breezeway, a couple walked by with 2 St. Bernard dogs. I reacted in pretty much the way you expect, and as I was heading out the door to meet the doggies, I heard Jess tell Becky "Aaaaaand we lost her." :D :D :D I'm nothing if not predictable, I suppose!

☀ Though it rained later, it was sunny as we ate at the Market. The Market building itself was SO crowded, so we ate outside Boulevard Bread on the picnic tables. We talked about houses; you can buy a LOT of house for not much money at all right now in Little Rock. Zak & Jess like Sherwood, while Bryan & I prefer west Little Rock.

☀ I drove out to the house we love so much to show it off to Jess...and discovered something I didn't know. There are DAFFODILS in the yard, you guys. "It's a sign," Jess pointed out. :D

As for today, I'm awake making cupcakes for tonight's potluck at work. It's in honor of mine & Rachel's birthdays. Kinda late, yes, but our birthdays both fell within the 2 week range where we switched over to Meditech, and we didn't really have the time to do the potluck then. I'm making pumpkin spice cupcakes (at Maria's request; she was working on 2 North one night when I made them and she loves them) and white cupcakes with chocolate frosting & sprinkles at Rachel's request, as those are her favorite.

Not likely to be awake long after I make the cupcakes, since I need the sleep and my back was killing me earlier, prompting me to take a Vicodin. I think it's the way I've been sitting on the sofa with my laptop. Gotta pay closer attention to that sorta thing.

Current Mood: accomplished
Current Music: "JTR (Hartford, CT)"++Dave Matthews Band++DMB LiveTrax Vol. 3 Hartford, CT

At the request of my Twitter friend Steven, here are photos of my Otter Box'd iPhone. It looks so bright & cheerful! Yellow & white FTW!

Front without clip

( More views )

The clip is a LOT more sturdy than I was willing to give it credit for at first. It clips snugly to a belt or pocket and it holds the phone really firmly. I am overall REALLY impressed with this, and I maintain so far it was worth $50.

Current Mood: mellow
Current Music: "Captive Delusions"++Béla Fleck & The Flecktones++Little Worlds Disc 2

I feel SO disconnected when I work 3 days in a row. I almost literally do nothing except work, eat and sleep when I'm on like this. No socializing except texting with Q & then sometimes I work with Jennifer. No LJ, very little tweeting. Ugh!

Twitter does really save my buns when I'm like this, though. I still feel like there are people out there and that breaks my hyperfocus a little.

Jennifer, my coworker & friend, is getting a new phone! She's getting a smartphone with a keyboard; a Samsung of some type. She was stoked because it comes in orange. Anyway, soon as she gets one, I'm getting her hooked up with Posterous & mobile Facebook so she can live on the internet like the rest of us.

I dreamed I met Dave Matthews Band. I dreamed they were quite old, and they were part of the Little Old Man Breakfast Brigade at McDonald's on Highland & Southwest Drive. This is quite funny, because it's one of those instances where 2 things I had thought of during the time I was awake (I tweeted about the LOMBB earlier today, and I was listening to DMB when I went to sleep) smashed together to make something hilarious. Boyd Tinsley had no teeth.

Time to go get ready for work. YEY. But it is my last night, so I can see the light at the end of the tunnel!

Current Mood: busy
Current Music: "The Last Jam" ++ Béla Fleck & The Flecktones ++ Little Worlds Disc 3

1. What would you do if a random stranger gave you a bouquet of roses?
I think I'd give them a hug. If the stranger is the type to go about giving away bunches of roses, they're probably the type who's okay with a grateful, excited hug.

2. What is the most commonly used color in your house?
I think it's red. Our walls & furniture & other "big" things are all neutral colors, but all my accent stuff (curtains, appliances, pillows, etc) is red.

3. What color is your favorite t-shirt?
I'd have to go with the neat T-shirt with the banded hem & fly-away sleeves I wore to the DMB concert in September. So it's a vivid, dark pumpkin orange.

4. If you could go back in time, what time would you live in and where would you live?
I like the time I live in now, honestly. Now I have access to the whole world on my computer instantly, at any time. Information flows more freely now than it ever has at any time and it's something I really love about my life. That said, if I had to pick an era, I'd want to check out Heian era Japan, and of course I'd want to have a high position of some sort. Because otherwise I wouldn't get to wear the whole outfit and dye my teeth. However, I think red hair would stand out, maybe...just a bit.

5. If you could have any ONE thing in the entire world (not including money) what would it be?
Star Trek style transporter beam! I want to be able to get anywhere in the world in the blink of an eye, without the expense or time of traveling. I could be anywhere I wanted for the afternoon. A jaunt to Tokyo. Trip to London. Visiting the Texas Grandminions would be a breeze; we could just go out for supper with them any time we wanted. We could live anywhere and I could satisfy my gypsy tendencies with ease. It would ROCK.

As you may have already noticed, last night I was called off work due to low census. I got the phone call as I was putting on my scrubs, so I made a quick diversion and wore jeans & a cardigan over my camisole instead. I packed my scrubs, because low census means you're still on call. If they'd gotten one single other admission last night, I would have been called in. As Scott said when I called him last night, Dr. Ball wasn't on call so HEY. I lucked out. (Dr. B is a surgery machine; he cranked out post-surg patients until the wee hours on Thanksgiving morning.)

So here's why I still went out: my younger sister got married last night. Courtney & Corey have only been dating for 4 months, but I'm not really worried about that. Bryan & I knew after we'd been dating for a week that we'd end up married. We actually looked at each other & said that at some point. :D I think Corey is a really good fit for Courtney; they have a ton in common and they genuinely like hanging out together. That's something Courtney has not had up to this point: someone who would really just rather hang out with her than do anything else. In the past I'd "hoped" things would work out for Courtney. Right now I believe things WILL work out for her.

But seriously you guys, I still think he looks like a James Bond villain! Look at him! Does he not look like he should be wearing a suit & an overly serious look & ordering minions to perform acts of evil?! This is completely at odds with his personality, by the way. I think if you kicked his puppy he'd cry. Well, first he would probably punch you and then cry, but that's pretty much what I'd do, too. He is REALLY awesome with Jagger, too.

ABOUT THE PARTY

Party still happening at my place on Saturday! Today Q & I are heading to Memphis to purchase cheese with which to make melty cheese goodness. I have 2 long, thin, crusty loaves of sourdough at home, but I am still asking people to bring things that we can dip in cheese or chocolate. Smoked sausage has proven to be a VERY good plan before now; we cut it in slices and pan-fried it and it was AMAZING in the gouda fondue. Bread of any kind is great; the harder the crust the better. Long, skinny bread with a stiff crust is awesome. Drinks: please bring things to drink! We have a mix of diet & regular soda people. Alcohol is welcome. I will have some amber Woodchuck Ciders & like 3 Toasted Almond Kahlua drinks already (I bought a package of them but they aren't creamy enough for me). Also we'll have Silk Soy Nog (what liquor is it that you're supposed to put in egg nog?). As for chocolate fondue, bring whatever fruit you like, but in the past we've also dipped cookies and frozen pound cake chunks, and that last one was INCREDIBLE. Basically if you bring it, it will get consumed. We eat a LOT at these parties and I didn't get much of a Thanksgiving so this is my replacement!

Bring cameras! It's fun.

If you do not know how to get to my house, please email me and I will give you directions from your location. It's not complicated until you hit the gravel portion of the drive, and then it's less complicated and more just obscure. There are not many landmarks out here, and it consists of me saying "Drive about this far" and "It's the 2nd road that goes to your right, not the first". My email, btw, is hillarygayle and it's at The Gmail. :D

Current Mood: peaceful
Current Music: "Live-In Skin" ++ Foo Fighters ++ There Is Nothing Left to Lose

I got off work. Slept all day. Ate a piece of pumpkin pie that Momma brought me so I wouldn't feel like I'd ENTIRELY missed Thanksgiving. Now I'm going back to work.

Don't get me wrong, I'm grateful for my job & this cup of coffee & my house & all my stuff, but I'm rather jealous of those of you who got to celebrate today. ^_^ I hope your turkey (or vegan substitute for!) was awesome and your desserts rocked.

Current Mood: envious

HAHAHAHHAHAHAHA I think I'm going to laugh forever over this link from

bluecanarykit: Hogwarts High.

A few days ago, I looked in the mirror on my way into the shower & realized something for the first time. I noticed it again this morning when I was changing shirts. I am changing shape.

You see, after I tossed dieting out the window I stopped paying attention to anything except the way my clothes fit, and that only to decide if I needed new clothes or anything. I didn't have any time for exercise during the nursing program. I have no idea how much I weigh.

But now, I run my legs off, push & pull patients and equipment, and hardly eat anything for 3 nights every week. I had heard Q talk about this phenomenon, but hadn't noticed it in myself until this morning. My waist is changing shape. I can't tell anything about my legs, but my waist shows a pretty dramatic change. I find it interesting, and even more: I find it interesting that I don't really have any EMOTIONAL reaction to this. At least not the one I'd have had long ago during the Weight Watchers fiasco. Once upon a time I would've been overjoyed to find that my love handles are almost entirely gone & that the post-Ganon baby pooch is shrinking significantly. Now I just find it curious. Also I find myself wondering if my clothes are gonna hang right, or if I'm going to have to do more shopping. -_- I think it'll be okay, since it's just the waistline & most of my clothes are tight around the baby-pooch anyway.

This morning I am home with Ganon. Carla, the delightful lady with whom he stays during days, lives in a rural area much like ours, with one big exception. Carla's house and Kim's house (my cousin, at who's house Carla often keeps the kids, since 2 of them belong to Kim) on the west side of town, close to the Cache River. The flooding from last week has already gone down here on the farm, but out there, the water is still rising as the runoff heads through them toward the river. Only large trucks could get through yesterday and the water was still rising according to Carla. Yikes! So I had to figure out alternate plans for Ganon. Instead of staying awake all night like I usually do, I just went to bed late, then got up with Bryan this morning. Momma's got an appointment at 9, so she's going to do that, come back & get Ganon, and I'll go to bed then. Hopefully it'll be enough to get me through tonight; I think it will.

Oh, the fun things you have to do for childcare.

Speaking of Ganon, he's been hilarious lately. He's much more verbal, at least when he's around people he knows. He's like his Daddy; he clams straight up if you're a "stranger", but if he knows you well, he'll say anything to make you laugh. My current favorite thing is when you say "I love you" he goes "You DO?!" as though he's overjoyed, and then when you say "Yes!" he goes "I loveshoo TOO!" like it's such a huge coincidence that he just discovered.

He also does that most time-honored of geek traditions: memorizing scenes from his favorite shows and quoting them back. Most of the time he does this in the context of acting out the scenes with his toys. He still likes Thomas but he's currently way into Bob the Builder. Bryan & I have deemed Bob an acceptable substitute, if not completely worthy. We liked Thomas better because it was narrated by a single person & didn't have voice acting. If something has voice acting there's always that one character with a horrid voice that you want to murder. For me, that one is Scrambler on Bob the Builder. I swear if I hear that stupid 4-wheeler yell "SCRAM TO THE VALLEY! SCRAM TO THE VALLEY!" one more time I'm going to set it on fire.

Now that he's been going to child care of sorts, he's better with other kids. Carla keeps kids for 3 other moms, 2 of whom are also nurses. It's 5 kids at the most; 3 of them are school-age, so it's just Ganon & Addison during the day. After school, though, he plays and plays with the other kids until Bryan comes & gets him, usually about 5. Since then, Ganon has been a lot more outgoing at the mall playground. He basically chooses a kid & goes to play with them. I've been monitoring who he plays with, and sometimes I'll redirect him to someone more appropriate (if he's latched onto a kid who's hitting or pretending wrestling moves, that's RIGHT out), but I don't usually have to intervene. He still shows a huge introverted streak, though. Sometimes we go by the playground and he peeks in. If he's in a certain mood and there are kids shrieking & running everywhere & it's crowded, he looks at me and says "I want trains first" and we go to the bookstore, instead. My mom would force the issue with us; if we were feeling introverted she felt she should work against that for some reason. I don't. If he's feeling introverted I'm not going to throw him into a playground packed with screaming kids. That's kind of torture.

He's learning manners. He says "please" & "thank you" most of the time without being prompted, and since he's developed a cough these days I am teaching him to cover his mouth. Now when he coughs he looks at me with his hand over his mouth like "Am I doing it right?" and of course I gush over how big a boy he is. :)

Of course as he gets older I'm going to lay off these particular details because hey--when he's in junior high he's not gonna want me to talk about his underpants. But for right now: did you know they make boxer briefs in 4T? HOW FREAKING CUTE IS THAT?

Sometimes if it wasn't for my awesome coworkers, I'd be trolling for a position in the ER by now. -_- This week, I'm scheduled Monday, Thursday & Friday nights. What the mess kind of schedule is that? You'd think that since you're dealing with night-shifters you'd try to schedule them 3 shifts in a row, or at least you'd try for only 1 day gaps. But this is ridiculous. -_-

I'm still at a loss as to which I like better. If I work 3 shifts in a row, it gets it out of the way & I'm good for the rest of the week. Gives me all of my break days together. The major drawback HERE is that the 3rd shift? Holy crap. That is one killer night. Like the end of a long race, where you only keep running because you forgot how to do anything else. When it's broken up with one off-night in the middle, it's irritating because I have to keep that night schedule, but at least it's a break.

With that, I'm off to see what I can accomplish while I'm awake. I think I want to vacuum.

Current Mood: energetic

The last week has been pretty nuts.

For a while I've been looking forward to 2 things: the bachelorette party & wedding of my good friend J to her fiance Z. Z & I dated when we were like 15/16-ish. He's the only ex-boyfriend I still have regular contact with & we get along swimmingly. I've known for a couple of months I'd be doing J's makeup for her wedding. SO FUN.

I worked on Tues, Wed, Fri nights this week. I was worried about making it for the wedding while, y'know, AWAKE, but there was never any question whether I'd make it for the bachelorette party.

Until Wednesday night happened.

In nursing, a general rule is that on a nursing floor, 5 patients per 1 nurse is an acceptable, safe ratio. Except that there's a nursing shortage, so sometimes we get more than that. Depending on the acuity of your patients (how Serious their Business is, how much attention has to be paid to what's going on with them) that number could be lower, but it's the general rule.

On Wednesday night I had 7 patients. Not just ANY 7 patients either. Four were post-surgical patients with nausea & vomiting out the wazoo (one of whom was receiving a blood transfusion), so I was constantly medicating & monitoring there. One was post-surgical for repair of an arterial bleed. One was in for monitoring of a surgical complication, and the last was uncontrolled blood glucose in for some really intensive treatment to get it handled. If you're a nurse you will automatically fill in the blanks & understand what an astounding task this is. If you're not, you need to know that each of these patients has a reason I MUST see them every hour, and in each case if there was ANYTHING out of the ordinary, it might take me an hour to handle it. If that out of the ordinary thing did happen, and it did take me an hour to handle it, it was going to throw everything out of whack. And it did. Several things happened that left me entirely unable to catch up. Normally I consider a shift well done if I accomplish all the routine stuff & handle anything special a patient might need. Wednesday night? I considered my shift well done because I did not die and neither did any of my patients. I never got to eat during the shift, never got to sit down, never even got to chart assessments. I am NOT a crier, and I nearly burst into tears of frustration several times. Once, in the medication room, Scott said something that made me laugh. I must've sounded hysterical, because he pointed out "You sound like someone who's laughing to keep from crying."

"Currently? Yes," I admitted.
"Are you the type who's going to cry in the car on the way home?"
I laughed again. "No. I am the type who's going to yell the f-bomb all the way home and then sleep like I've been bricked in the forehead."
"Sweet," Scott replied.

I did not get to leave work until 9am, and then I did exactly as I said I would. When I hit the bed at 10am, I slept like I'd been knocked out. When I woke up to my alarm at 4pm to get ready for the party, I dangled my legs off the bed. Blood pressure instantly dropped, my vision blurred, and a headache bloomed from the back of my head forward. I called JF, another friend who was organizing the party. Sounding like I'd been hit by a truck, I told her there was no way I could make it. I have no way of emphasizing how DISAPPOINTING THIS WAS. I had been looking forward to this for weeks, and I needed a happy bright spot. NEEDED. But I couldn't do it. Physically, I wasn't going to be up for any kind of partying, much less driving to Little Rock safely. I would've caused a giant interstate pile up all by myself. So I had to bow out. They went to one of my favorite places in Little Rock and did karaoke. :( OMG HOW SO JEALOUS.

I then proceeded to sleep until 6pm. When Bryan & Ganon got home, Bryan took one look at me and told me he thought I should sleep that night regardless of the fact that I had work again on Friday. "I think you could sleep tonight and STILL manage a huge nap in the morning, frankly." I thought he was wrong, but at 11pm I really couldn't keep it together anymore, and I had to go to bed. I slept until 6am, got up & ate breakfast, went back to bed around 8am, and slept until 3pm. So, after the Shift of Ultimate Fail, I slept 22 hours. HARD. There are clearly limits to the abuse I can inflict upon myself.

I got up and with what can only be described as grim determination, went back to work on Friday night. Friday was not nearly so bad as Wednesday, but it was busy enough that I didn't get to chart until after 7. I left at 8am, flying home and getting into bed for a couple of hours. Q worked part of Friday night too, and it was determined that Bryan needed to go to the wedding with us because neither of us could be SURE we'd be safe to drive.

So we did, bringing Ganon as well. Makeup was done, and I might say that J looked pretty smashing, as did JF, as did Z's sisters (whom I did not fancify, but looked gorgeous as well). I desperately hoped the makeup stood up to photographing. That was the first time I'd done someone's makeup with the understanding they'd be in camera flash all night. I tried to go as matte as possible, and I did a lot of eye definition & not much else. I was going for elegant & timeless, since, well, no one wants geometric purple eyeshadow in their wedding pics. Well okay someone out there does, but I didn't think it was J. :D Anyway I'm seeing some preliminary pictures up on Facebook already, and I think the makeup did well in the photos.

So that is my insane, hectic week. It's been all day yesterday & part of today trying to write it down. I'm ready for an adventure of my own making. I'm cooking up thoughts of a Halloween 2.0 get-together and looking up Eureka Springs weekend packages. :)

Current Mood: thankful

Just for my own personal enjoyment. Sometimes I think there's no way I'd have the first thing in common with Dave Matthews as a human (you should see his artwork on the most recent album; his brain must be PURELY artistic), and then he does an interview like this, and I realize we think very similarly about certain subjects.

( Dave Matthews on racism & other stuff )

Shopping around on Sephora and OH WOW. I have a weakness for makeup kits. I like to have a lot of makeup at my disposal to make choices & achieve certain specific styles. Kits give me lots of picking & choosing options all in a glance.

Sephora PURE Natural Believer Palatte in Wanderlust. I love the greens & blues, and mixed with the browns these could be REALLY striking.

This, though...THIS is the big one. HOLY CRAP LOOK AT ALL THAT STUFF FOR ONLY $50! *twitches & falls over* All those lip glosses I could blend for effects (especially the purples + browns)! Those glitter eyeshadows to go over colors! Brushes! Cream eyeliners! Y'all I'm seriously drooling over this thing.

MWA HA HA! As I was looking at it, Bryan walked by. I showed it to him and his first statement was the same as my first thought: "I can't imagine how much that thing must cost." I told him, and his eyes went all big. "Well BUY IT, then! That's a crazy good deal!" I guess I only needed a little nudge, so I did! I'm now the proud owner of that extremely large Sephora makeup kit. *FLAIL* I can't wait to play with it!

I took a 2 hour nap today but that was it. Aside from that I've been awake since 3pm yesterday. I am pretty incredibly sleepy.

Went to a training on "building a culture of safety" this morning. It was good information; it's required for all hospital staff & I approve of the message. Especially on the floor, there are a lot of things we do, shortcuts we take, that can lead to life-altering events for patients if they happen at the wrong time. That doesn't need to happen, so we need to be more careful.

On Monday & Tuesday I have Meditech training. It's the new computer charting software for the hospital. I'm not looking forward to it for 2 reasons: 1) computer classes always bore the crap out of me. I'll be in a class with people going "double click? How do I double click?" or "I should click 'save' now?" and I'll be about 30 steps ahead of them, bored to tears. 2) DAVE MATTHEWS BAND on Tuesday night. The Meditech class ends at 4:30 so that should be more than enough time to make Little Rock by 7:00, but it doesn't exactly leave me lots of time to get prettied up for the concert. -_- Wait holy cow I have no idea what I want to wear yet. o_O

Current Mood: busy
Current Music: "Everyday (Golden Gate Park)" ++ Dave Matthews Band ++ DMB LiveTrax Vol. 2: Golden Gate Park - San Francisco, CA - September 12, 2004 [Disc 3]

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